Tiger Woods Likes Ass. Next.

For weeks, I’d planned to write a piece about how I’m over race.

It was intended to be a response to the made-up furor over the race of the women Tiger Woods cheated on his wife with. I’d planned to talk about how my children have been raised in multi-cultural New York City, how their lives are not bound by racial identity, how they know they are free to chose their friends, crushes, and eventual boyfriends and girlfriends on the basis of all the characteristics that matter — none of those being race, or even religion.

I was going to talk about how I often say that my daughter probably will wind up marrying a Jewish man and converting to Judaism.  I was also going to mention that my eight-year-old son never saw a blonde he didn’t like, so I understand where Tiger may be coming from.

But I’ve since scrapped my plans for that piece.

It remains true that my children refuse to let themselves be defined solely by race — or at least, the narrow litmus tests of “blackness” or “keeping it real.”  They don’t know how to dance.  My son doesn’t like hip-hop, and my daughter likes it only as one of many musical genres.  Most of their closest friends, are well as their early crushes, are white.

I don’t consider this either a source of pride or cause for concern. It is what it is.  They are who they are.  Things may change as they get older, or they may not.  The people my children will ultimately develop into may be influenced by their environment, but it is not up to me.  I like the people they are developing into.  I hope they do, too.

The story about Tiger Woods and his many affairs should have had no racial component, but people injected race into the discussion where it didn’t belong.  A story about a golfer who cheated on his wife with more than a dozen women turned into a story about a black golfer who cheated on his blonde, white Swedish wife with more than a dozen, mostly blonde white women.

Somehow this happened, even though Tiger has never identified himself as black.  At one point, it seemed like white people and black people were holding a contest to see who could most successfully “out” Tiger as black. 

Vanity Fair, with its “Tiger Woods as scary shirtless black dude who wants to mug you” cover photo, seems to have won that prize.

Look, Tiger Woods is an ass.  On that point, I think nearly everyone agrees.  Tiger Woods also likes ass.  We can all agree on that, too.  Wouldn’t it be great if an asshole could just be an asshole, without concern for the color of his skin?

The rest of it isn’t worth analyzing.  Tiger Woods is neither the first nor the last professional athlete to be a poon-hound.  We have no idea how many women he actually slept with — assuming some of those women had enough dignity to keep their affairs private — or will sleep with in the future.  We don’t know the race of those unknown women, not that it matters.  And since I’m not his wife, I don’t care.

I don’t understand those who say “Tiger disappointed me as a role model,” but no matter.  As a golfer, Tiger rarely disappoints.  I hope he returns to professional golf playing at the high level we’ve all grown accustomed to.  Whatever reason anyone may have had for looking up to Tiger as a role model in the past, I hope those people will limit their admiration and appreciation for him in the future to his performance on the golf course.

So, for my part, I’m going to keep mulling over the post-racial piece.  Maybe one day it can actually be written. For now, I’m just going to continue to watch how things develop, and mostly shake my head.

As for my son, his tastes may already be evolving.  The other day, a commercial came on for the perfume J’adore, and my son declared the blonde model “too skinny” with hair that “looked like a bird’s nest.”  Watching the New Year’s Eve shows, he declared Keri Hilson “hot.”

What do I think it means?

I think it means he likes hot women who aren’t too skinny and who comb their hair.

I’m OK with that.


5 Responses to “Tiger Woods Likes Ass. Next.”

  1. Saida M. Latigue Says:

    Carolyn, great article.

    When I saw the Vanity Fair cover, I immediately thought of the Newsweek cover of O.J. so many years ago. All I could think was, “When you’re a bad guy, you’re black – – instantly”. In our society, that seems to be the case each and every time. Yet – – Charlie Sheen is still on his hit tv show, and he threatened to KILL his wife and cover up evidence of the crime if it in fact, happened.

    White guys can be “bad boys” but black men are criminals? *sigh*…

  2. Sherril Gerard Says:

    So on point. Your writing is prolific. You should send this in to one of the golfing magazines as an editorial.

  3. NYC Single Mom Says:

    Great take on the article. I agree with you on the race thing. Who is Tiger going to date? Golfing is white world, Stanford is predominately white. He was introduced to his wife by another golfer.

    I agree with you on the role model thing. He will go down in history as one of the best golfer in the world. Punto. Thats it. People is never as they seem. If you go back to the GQ article from the last 90’s which is the last time he actually was himself, it is obvious that his people put the kibosh on any impromptu interviews that he wasnt coached. That was the real Tiger.

    With regards to the cover, its laugable because those photos have been sitting in a vault and because of the scandal and the fact that annie liebovitz is broke she sold him out.


  4. Lucila Kehm Says:

    haha, Tiger is so funny! Hopefully he recovers from this..

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