5 Random Thoughts

Since it’s been a while since my last post, I thought I’d share with you some of the things that have been on my mind lately:

1. Health

Blame it on the Aquavit.  At my last book club meeting, our host treated us to certain traditional Swedish beverages, in honor of the book we were reading, Stieg Larsson’s The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo.  Between the Aquavit, the sangria, the cheesy lasagna and other goodies, I left the meeting intoxicated and bloated — and was sick as a dog the next day.  This wasn’t a hungover kind of sick.  This was an acid-refluxy, can’t lie down, burning chest please-make-it-stop kind of sick.  I made the mistake of going on webMD and had soon convinced myself I was dying of esophageal cancer.  Completely freaked out, I quickly made an appointment with my gastroenterologist.

In the meantime, I put myself on a strict vegan, gluten-free diet and eliminated both alcohol and my favorite beverage, coffee.  The awful acid reflux symptoms subsided, which gave me some comfort that my webMD self-diagnosis was probably a bit off.  Still, I couldn’t wait for that appointment.

Turns out I don’t have GERD, or esophageal cancer.  I am on a 60-day course of Nexium, with the full expectation that all will be well in a couple of months.  Thanks to the vegan diet, I’ve lost most of the extra weight I picked up after my mom passed last August.  I’ve allowed coffee and alcohol back into my life in moderation, although “moderation” means something entirely different now than it used to.  But there’s nothing like a health scare to make you value the life you have.


My son was recently diagnosed with ADHD.  He underwent the testing during my posting hiatus.  I haven’t fully processed what this means yet.  The diagnosis and report have helped me understand his behavior and the way he does and does not process information.  Beyond that, I have no real thoughts about it yet.  I am meeting with professionals this week to help understand our options.  I know I’m at the beginning of a long and interesting journey.  In the meantime, I’m just enjoying having a kid who has practically memorized several texts on Greek mythology and who now wants to do a comparative analysis with the Bible.  I’m sure I’ll have more to say about this in future posts.

3. Erykah Badu’s “Window Seat” video

Confession: I’m not an Erykah Badu fan.  I liked “Bag Lady” and “Tyrone.”  I can’t name one of her albums.  I understand she speaks to a lot of women, just as India.Arie does, but I find her as affected as that stupid dot between India.Arie’s first and second names.  People are raving about this video.  If you like it, good for you.  To me, it’s derivative and unoriginal.  Fiona Apple and Alanis Morrisette did nudity in videos better.

4. African Diaspora Film Festival’s “Black Motherhood and Society” Film Series

On March 28, I had the pleasure of being on a panel discussing “Black Motherhood and Society” at ADFF’s Black Motherhood and Society Film Series.  Great discussion, terrific audience participation, and wonderful panelists.  I’ve done a decent amount of public speaking on law and the legal profession, but this was the first time I branched out and spoke on a topic related to my personal writings.  I really enjoyed it and look forward to taking advantage of future public speaking opportunities.

5.  Seriously?

I often find myself trying to discern what image I project to the world, and how that image jibes with my own self-image.  I can’t say I’ve quite figured it out.  There does seem to be a disconnect between the image I have of myself and the image I project to the world at large.  Some of that is purposeful.  At work, I’m generally pretty serious.  In negotiations, I often play the role of the tough-but-fair lawyer.  But I also have a silly side, one that people who know only the serious Carolyn tend not to expect.  One of my goals is to project a more complete picture of who I am to the world, instead of using Serious Carolyn as a shield to ward people off.

A more complete post will be coming soon.  In the meantime, your thoughts on any or all of the above are welcome.


7 Responses to “5 Random Thoughts”

  1. Beverly Jackson Says:

    I really enjoyed reading your post. The stories I felt were right on the mark.
    Keep posting 🙂

  2. The Wenchette Says:

    1) Vegan? Role model.
    2) Will your son share his pills?
    3) Hope the record sells.
    4) Yay
    5) Do you!

  3. Olivia Says:

    My son is 11 and we are going to have him tested in June. That’s the first date we could get and since this place came highly recommended by his pediatrician I decided to wait and go there. This was his first year in middle school and it has been a struggle. The counselor suggested that I have him tested for ADD. If that is his diagnosis, I’m not sure how I will take the news either but at least I will know what we are dealing with.

    I hope you find the right course of treatment for your son. He sounds like a brilliant kid.

    I really enjoy your writing. Keep up the good work!

  4. A Donk By Any Other Name « Carolyn A. Edgar Says:

    […] Carolyn A. Edgar Notes of a lawyer, writer, and single mom « 5 Random Thoughts […]

  5. Bert Delgado Says:

    ADHD is one of the most over diagnosed disorders in my opinion. Can’t get up on time? ADHD! Not doing all your work? ADHD, etc….I know because I was diagnosed with this too. From my own personal challenges and experiences…rest assure I don’t care if my child has to tap dance while reading to get it done, I’ll never allow the use of CII Narcotic Stimulants like Adderall, Ritalin, Concerta, Daytrona to even be an option. Stratera has been showing really good results and it’s a non-narcotic medication to treat the problem. Whatever you do…NO NARCOTICS.

  6. Sara Says:

    regarding Badu vs. others…it struck me that the two performers you mentioned where white. I love all 3 ladies for different reasons, and I’m sure that race was not in any way implicit in your choice of well done nude videos…but it still stood out to me. I liked the Window Seat video exactly because Black women’s bodies are so stigmatized, so often viewed as ugly or deformed (historically speaking). No matter what metaphors might be applied to Window Seat, I thought it was refreshing just to be naked, be nothing but herself. I think each of the videos you named was unique and important in a different way.

  7. A Donk By Any Other Name | carolynedgar.com Says:

    […] Opinions may vary about the message and merit of Erykah Badu’s “Window Seat” video, but men and […]

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